Welcome to Mighty Mamas, an ongoing series where mamas share their candid and raw thoughts on motherhood. Our intention is to create a supportive forum for sharing without judgment. Mamas - you are so mighty! Let's use that strength to build a powerful group of wonderful women who believe in motherhood.
Each week, we'll ask our mighty mamas a different question and get each of their perspectives. Join us here each Monday as mighty mamas talk motherhood.
What is your best piece of advice for a brand new mother?
"I'm usually giving new foster mommas advice and the one thing I tell them is to build a circle of support. You need those people around you that will be a shoulder to cry on, a listening ear to vent to, someone to give you the high five when things are going well."
- Kayce, Mom to one, Preschool Teacher, Non Profit Founder
"Treat yourself gently and give yourself some grace. You are going to need this more than anything anyone else can offer you. In the night when you find yourself frustrated by your wailing little one; when you are struggling to feed your baby, or figure out nap-time, or find your own way; at the end of a long day where you felt you missed every opportunity to get things right; in all of these moments, there isn't a parenting book or fancy gadget in the world that will save you. You will be saved only by the grace that you offer yourself. Just as your new baby is learning everything for the first time, you, too, are learning everything there is to know about loving someone so intensely, so relentlessly. And it is one wild ride; so, be gentle with yourself. "
-Aimee, Mom to three, Homeschooling Stay at Home Mom, Writer, Blogger
"Truly engage with your kids as much and as often as you can! Sit on the ground with them, free of your adult-life distractions and interact- be silly, snuggle, make a mess, laugh a lot, wonder with them and learn from them. Don’t be the mother sitting on the park bench so engrossed in her phone that her child’s invitation to play is a burden. This truly hurts my heart! These parents and children are missing out on so so much! "
- Brandi, Mom to two, Stay at Home Mom, Small Business Owner
"Don't take everyone's advice. Trust yourself. Lots of people will tell you to enjoy every moment but the reality is that you won't and that is okay. Introduce yourself to your new acquaintance, Mama Guilt and keep them in check. Mama Guilt will sneak in in the most vulnerable moments and has to be shown the door to vacate. Stay conscious of this. Show yourself some compassion and give yourself permission to struggle. Be kind to yourself as you navigate this new role, it's hard. Everything in your life just got throw up in the air and it takes time to settle back down. Don't expect it to settle down where it was pre-baby. This season of your life is unlike any other and it can be incredibly rewarding. However, it is also so completely challenging, and overwhelming. Many times, you will be reduced to a pool of tears on the floor. Be extra tender with yourself in these most moments. Ask for help even when you don't want to. Asking for help is a sign of strength not weakness. Please remember that."
- Rachel, Mom to two, Marketing Business Analyst, Small Business Owner
"Speak up and don't be afraid to ask for help! I talk about my postpartum depression a lot, but it's important. I really struggled with suicidal thoughts and hurting myself. Moms are terrified to share those feelings because they're afraid of what might happen to their families or that their friends will desert them. You don't have to mother alone. It really does take a village to help raise a child, and even more so when a mama is struggling with PPD or anxiety. There is strength in recognizing our weaknesses and seeking help to combat them!"
-Kelly, Mom to two, School Secretary, Bookkeeper
"Live in the moment. You are the ideal mother for your child and they are tailor made for you. Together, you will smooth one another's rough edges, discover life through each other's eyes, and know the beauty of unconditional love."
-Dana, Mom to five, Grandma to five, Teacher
"There is so much advice out there for new moms – from books and magazine articles to blogs and well-meaning strangers – and you’ll find that one person’s advice conflicts with others. I’ve come to the conclusion that the reason for this is that there is no single right answer. So, if you like the advice and you think it will work for you, try it out. If not, forget about it. No matter how good someone else’s credentials are, they don’t know your kid as well as you do."
-Kasey, Mom to two, Attorney
"I would say to be gentle with yourself. That mommy guilt comes with the territory, but if you're aware of it, maybe it'll be less of a weight. And ... never deprive someone of the chance to do a good deed (i.e. become good at accepting help)."
- Amanda, Mom to three, Stay at Home Mom, Small Business Owner
"No matter how hard you try to do things the "right" way, there will always be someone, somewhere, that will judge how you are raising your child.
Best thing I have learned (and am still learning) is to trust your instinct, and raise your child the best way that works for your family. If your child is happy and smiles at you when you enter the room, then you're doing a fantastic job!"
-Yadhira, Mom to one, Engineering
"Follow your gut, your instinct will most likely be right when it comes to your little one and don't be hard on yourself - Being a mama is hard but so rewarding."
- Komal, Mom to one, GIS Analyst, Small Business Owner
WHAT IS YOUR BEST PIECE OF ADVICE FOR A BRAND NEW MOTHER?
P.S. If you enjoyed this, you may also enjoy MIGHTY MAMAS.
If you are interested in contributing to this series, contact us and let us know.